10 things every glasses wearer will know
Glasses are cool. But the oil and pimples around the rims are not. Nor is the dumb feeling of waking up with no clue where you left them, only to find them in a really obvious spot. And don’t get me started on…
Glasses wearers put up with A LOT that frameless folks just don’t understand — do your pet hates make the list?
1. Blind showers
You grab a quick shower before work and it takes way longer than it should. There’s nowhere to put the darn things and if you wear them they get foggy. You cut your legs while shaving and condition your hair before shampooing — and god forbid if you drop the soap.
2. Stress-free naps
You find a few minutes to rest your eyes but can’t get comfy. You wake up an hour later with your glasses all askew and a big red mark on the side of your face. Perfect.
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3. Cooking in a fog
Nigella is calm and looks like a supermodel when cooking, but she doesn’t wear glasses. You’d like to see her make a prize winning casserole while not being able to see because of fogged-up lens.
4. Sunglasses envy
You envy people who can slip any pair of sunglasses they want. You need expensive prescription lenses that are out of fashion within a few months. It’s either that or wearing flip-up dark lenses and looking like you’re stuck in the 90s.
5. Making-up a blurry face
You do your makeup and get ready to head out the door, only to put on your glasses and see the results of your efforts — and smear them with black streaks of mascara.
You can’t get them into a position you’re happy with, or there’s no good angle to stop glare bouncing off them — somehow they always ruin the photo. And you dread anyone asking you to take one of them; it would be a question of pretending you can see or cramming your rims against the viewfinder.
7. Phantom glasses
You place them down somewhere and forget you’re not wearing them, only to realise when you push a phantom rim up your nose. You go to bed after having a few drinks and wake up with yet another bent pair.
8. Anything involving water
You can’t go for a nice leisurely swim, a spontaneous bathe in the sea, or a quick dip in the pool — no, you need specialist eyewear for that.
9. Back-up pairs
You don’t want to be in constant fear of misplacing or breaking your only pair, so if you go away even a few days you bring several pairs of backup glasses.
10. Any form of exercise or activity
It’s the day of your exercise class but you left your glasses at work or somewhere or other. You’ve learnt to practice yoga while balancing the frames on your face but today its high-intensity boxercise. You pray for whoever’s standing beside you.